my rider

i've decided that i need to write my celebrity rider.  as a celebrity in my own right, here's are the things i must have in my dressing room, in no particular order because EVERYTHING on the list better be there.
4 - 64oz bottles of ocean spray cranberry juice cocktail at room temperature
2 queen size microfiber soft blankets.  they must be new, and washed with nice and fluffy fabric softener.  Nice and Fluffy is the only fabric softener brand you can wash it in.  YES ITS THAT IMPORTANT.
2 couches.  big.  with fluffy pillows.  pillows must be soft.  couch must be soft.
1 case of Figi brand water.  cold.  must not be frozen.
fresh cut fruit basket from fruitexpressions.
1 big seedless watermelon.  room temperature.  please have clean knife ready to cut it.
my dressing room must be freshly cleaned before i arrive but i better not smell bleach or any frangrance.  i am sensitive to odors and fragrances.
2 cans of dole pinapple chunks.
1 container of cottage cheese brand must be either breakstone or light and lively.
i must have access to a wireless internet connection and several grounded power strips.
2 fresh cucumbers and bag of dole mixed green salad mix.
1 bottle of blushwine vinagarette - cold.
2 cans of faust brand RED salmon.
1 manual can opener (must not be automatic or electric)
silverware and placesettings for 6 people must be spotless.
menus available for my guest to the local takeout joint that must specialize in italian food and have broiled fish on the menu.
please keep my dressing room between 72 and 74 degrees Fahrenheit.

don't take too much to make me happy.  whats on your rider?